The Grand Moobabalah of Mars, Michael Valentine Smith, issued a press
release today denying allegations that Mars is harboring Saddam
Hussein. The press release branded the allegations, issued
yesterday by NASA, the Homeland Security Department, and the President,
as blatant falsehoods. The press release included photographs
which were described as the "true face of Mars". The images were
reported to be close ups of the infamous "Martian Face".
Michael
Valentine Smith,
Grand Moobabalah of Mars
Low
Resolution Image of Martian Face
Closeup of
Martian Face
"The True Face of Mars"
The Martians, well known admirers of Britney Spears, also categorically
denied charges that Mars possesses weapons of mass destruction.
"We are a peaceful race" said the Grand Moobabalah. "These
allegations are born of racist attitudes brought about by decades of
Hollywood images of Mars and Martians as warlike", he said. The
Grand Moobabalah brought up the example of Britney Spears, a native
martian, as one way in which Mars is attempting to shed its negative
image. "The Martian Face is our own modest attempt to reveal our
true nature", said the Grand Moobabalah. Spears was unavailable
for comment.
The Grand Moobabalah had no comment on recent charges that Mars has a
sophisticated nuclear weapons program.
